Empty. No life. Lonely. Numb. Confused. I Can’t Breathe. How long is it going to be like this?

I don’t know who I am. I keep doing things and trying things just to see if I’m there, but I’m not. Nothing effects me. Scary things don’t phase me anymore, except for that thought. I think too much. I think about who I was and where I’ve gone, and when I will return. I feel more self conscious now, like I hate everything about me. Inside and out. I hate it, almost resent it. I know what caused all this too. I feel sadness a lot now, all the time actually. I walk around with no emotions. Nothing. I only think about one thing, and it’s how things could be different.

But Is anyone listening? No. 

Everyone just says their disappointed in me. For all the mistakes I’ve made lately. I wish they knew what was going on. They wouldn’t care. Every time I try to tell them, something else is always more important. So might as well not try. Trying. I’m done trying. I’m done trying to live up to all these expectations that I fail, and then having to explain myself.

All I want to do is sit down next to my window, with a hot cup of tea, listen to acoustic songs, and cry. 

(Source: out-of-reach-dreams)